As I sit at home in New Jersey just hours away from the site of each attack, I am listening to the names of all those who perished on that awful day, September 11, 2001. Individuals who are in some way connected to the fallen are reading the names of their own loved ones and those beloved by so many others. Most heart-rending to me are the ones reading in memory of their parents, siblings and spouses. I know where I was that day, what I thought, and the way it has changed the way that I live. But that is not important in this moment. In the face of very real grief, the qualities of those who have passed are being remembered. I can't help but wonder, if my name was on that list, what would be said of me? What words would immortalize my memory? The sacrifice was inadvertent for many of the victims. Each one started the day just like everyone else on the East Coast, unaware that it would be their last. How am I living now that would be remembered if today were my last? I know how I want to be remembered, but what impression am I leaving? If the lady filling the coffee pots at Wawa were the last person I ever spoke to, would I have left her with a kind word and a smile? If the UPS guy at our door were the last person to interact with me, would I have shown him Christ? And then there are those closest to me, who see me in all of my tattered, human glory. What would live on in their memory after all of the kind words from others had drifted away?
Titus 2:7 says, "Show yourself, in all respects, to be a model of good works and in your teaching show integrity, dignity..." Recently it was pointed out to me that this idea of being a "model of good works" is that of being a form or mold that once it makes an impression on the clay or other molding material, leaves a impression that looks like the mold. This is the kind of impression we are to be leaving on each other. I pray that the way that I live will not shape lives after Lauren, but rather that after knowing me, others will look a little more like Him.
If this is confusing to you in any way, or if you have questions about what it means to follow Christ and to have a relationship with them, please contact me. Click here for Lauren's email