Purpose and Presence
The truth is that I have started to write this post, and then written, re-written, deleted and given up about a dozen times over the last month or so. I don’t have any big announcement to make. It’s just that sometimes words are difficult, and trying to give a realistic glimpse into life here is hard. We are having one of the most stunningly gorgeous autumn that I've seen here in a long time. There is much joy to be had in going on walks and soaking up the color and the smells of falling leaves. I actually dictated most of this update as I walk. On days like today, I wonder why it was so hard to get myself out the door, but then as I walked, I realized that my hesitation has less to do with how I feel about being outdoors, and more to do with the reflection and inevitable confrontation of myself. There has been a lot of change at school and in me this year and I think it is taking a little more of a toll on me then I'd like to admit. Sometimes I want to cast blame and othe